Please note: this article deals with the sensitive topic of self-harm so reader discretion is advised.
Self-harm is a complex behaviour that can be devastating for the individual involved and also for those around them.
Self-harm may include self-injurious behaviour like cutting, burning, or scratching the skin, pulling out hair (trichotillomania), or engaging in behaviours such as disordered eating, misusing alcohol and other substances, over-exercising, or getting into risk situations.
It’s important that we know how to support someone who self-harms, and how to help them keep themselves as safe as possible.
Listen to our podcast episode about having sensitive conversations around self-harm.
Self-harm is typically a sign of underlying emotional or psychological distress, and individuals who self-harm are often coping with overwhelming emotions or difficult life situations, including, but not limited to:
They may hurt themselves as a way of managing these difficult feelings. They may not have the tools to deal with traumatic memories or experiences, and may use self-harm as a coping mechanism, albeit a maladaptive one.
When emotions are overwhelming, self-harm can ‘seem’ to help by providing temporary relief and re-instilling a feeling of control. It offers a physical outlet for intense, overwhelming distress that is otherwise hard to cope with.
Emotional pain can often be incredibly difficult to articulate verbally, so for some people, self-harm may serve as a way to communicate their pain or distress to others when expressing their feelings verbally is impossible. In other words, it can be an external representation of how someone is feeling internally.
Engaging in self-harm behaviour can also be a form of self-punishment, often due to feelings of guilt, shame, or low self-esteem, where individuals may try to justify or rationalise the need to self-harm.
Watch our Spotlight On…video about supporting individuals who self-harm.
Supporting someone who self-harms can be challenging as this behaviour often happens ‘behind closed doors’ and individuals can often conceal the true extent of their distress, sometimes in an attempt to protect those around them.
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